You can die from breathing too much???

Currently Watching

My living list of things i'm watching/reviewing.

Acting / AlterNative Magazine / Designing etc.

 My mind has been an explosion of ideas and creativity lately. I'm in the end chapters of the book I've been writing, exciting about some film projects I'm a part of (and want to continue working on), I've had this magazine idea that died and is revived AND am evolving my etsy business ideas. So I'm going to write about it here. I need to get it out.  The Filming? I kinda stumbled into the acting part on accident but have met THE COOLEST creative community, actors, directors and people through this. I don't want to stop. I love especially how the project's I'm in have been bringing Native/ Indigenous folklore to life. I've been documenting my creative journey and projects on my TikTok @ChronicallyIndigigoth which has been fun. It's taught me to get outside of my comfort zone and take initiative. If I don't chase my passions and try to inspire someone else is going to. Qualification in things like this is a myth, passion, being willing to be embarrassed and learn, and pushing oneself is what makes the magic happen.  On my Etsy I have been selling thrifted mystery boxes, and although I might continue doing this a little bit, I'm going to redirect my attention to personally made Altered clothing, posters, stickers. Items that reflect the projects I'm working on and could contribute to fundraising and helping me make it happen fulltime. I want more native stories and amazing film to be out there; I want a magazine for Native communities to contribute to and be heard. I want our youth to be inspired and proud. There are a lot of Indigenous publishers, clubs and groups out there, but I've had trouble reaching out. I feel like I need to make the success happen. They're not going to notice and help until they can't help but notice.  I think one of my biggest challenges with my writing right now is figuring out publishing/ editing. It is my first finished book so I will have to finish it before pitching. I'm admittedly nervous about that. Do I self-publish or work with publishers that are Indigenous friendly?  I think now I will focus on finishing the book, transitioning my shop & an LLC & website instead of an Etsy shop. I'll Interview people that have succeeded, get advice out there from them for people like me. I'm going to continue documenting the journey and progress here as well, If you made it this far thankyou for reading :)  Kate

Songs that trigger my frisson.

Frisson is a physically felt signature of an emotion, a somatic marker. Like nausea and disgust, or a rapid heartbeat and anxiety, this feeling in the body coincides with an emotion in the mind (and thus makes the body-mind distinction much more blurry). The specific somatic marker of frisson is experimentally tied to peak emotional experiences and the most meaningful moments during exposure to different stimuli, such as  songs or speeches or art pieces. And amazingly, aesthetic chills seem to be an almost universal marker of peak emotional experiences across a wide range of cultures and continents. This universality is really rare—usually, expressions of emotion are quite different across cultural contexts—and this means that we can potentially use chills as a way to study emotion in the body in diverse peoples and places. We have a remarkable embodied feeling (a somatic marker) which is tied to this abstract emotion (meaningful moments), as if we could reach out and directly touch 'meaning-making'.

Benjamin, Adorno, Horkheimer, And A Path Backward Through Hegel

I've been reading Benjamin, Adorno, and Horkheimer, and the more I do the more I realize how much of what they're saying comes from conversations with the thinkers before them. It feels like walking into a room where everyone’s already mid conversation. This deep dive is my way of tracing those voices backward. I want to understand where ideas come from, how they evolve across time, and what they say about art, memory, and what it means to create something that feels alive.

31 days of horror (for horror fans)

If you enjoy horror films this one is for you? 

Reign of Terror

Comprehensive Timeline of Ryan Walters Reign of Terror in Oklahoma and Beyond For the first time in modern Oklahoma History, nearly every parent in Oklahoma was in agreement that Ryan Walters was bad at his job. Across party lines, Oklahomans celebrated when he officially resigned. Within days, his mandates are began to get struck down one by one. But Ryan doesn't exist in a vacuum, he was strategically chosen and propped up to a position of power. If he was so hated, why didn't he end up getting removed from power sooner; and more importantly: Who helped him rise to power, and how do we stop something like this from happening again?  

31 Days of Halloween (Easy Intro to Horror)

Found this wonderful list of horror films for people just getting into the halloween spirit and aren't super comfortable with horror films.  See the original post here  

My 2025 October watchlist

Strange & Necessary

Strange & Necessary is a deep dive into the gothic literature, film and folklore. It’s for the too-beautiful, the too-strange, the too-questioning creatures  that unsettle the world simply by existing. Here I unravel history, film, and folklore while weaving in the threads of my own book. This is a candlelit diary of orphans, sin-eaters, poisons, crows, and heroines who reveal society’s hypocrisy and remind us that difference is not only strange, but necessary.

31 Movies to Watch in October (best atmosphere)

I may make a few of these lists.  The first is inspired by a youtube video I saw recently. I'll share the youtube video on the deep dive as well. 

Insidious Mood Study: Haunted Houses

This collection grew out of research I did while preparing for my role as Director of Photography on Absolution, a short film influenced by the eerie textures of Insidious. Below are some of the sources I read, listened to, and observed during prep, interviews, film references, and photographic work that capture the same sense of domestic dread and ghostly stillness.

Halloween (Movies) BTS Vault

Every era, same cold breath. Behind-the-scenes reels and featurettes across Halloween 1 through 6, H20, Rob Zombie’s duology, and 2018. Lighting blue nights, carving the mask, building the score, and swapping stories with the people who made Haddonfield

Harris Savides

A running notebook on Harris Savides, sparked by one more Zodiac rewatch. Collected interviews and behind-the-scenes mini-docs. Share any missing gems.

Horns of God, Horns of The Beast: A Brief History of How The Devil Got His Horns

Where did the Devil himself get his horns? The horned beast, with a pitchfork and a silly tail is never once described in The Bible. So, where did the world's great deceiver get his signature look?

Movie Inspiration for Final Girls Film

These are the films that are important for the characters and aesthetics of the short film Final Girls. 

the tornado that changed the world for ever

i am a 31 year old man who likes to record tornados but somethings been off with them 

Forgotten Horror That Deserves Another Look

A collection of lesser known horror films from the '60s to the '90s that never got the love they deserved. 

Holdupbabyradio.com journey

Well it allll started in 20118

Hipster Survival Guides

Welcome to the "Hipster Survival Guides" series.  Your daily read on all the situations you might find yourself in as a vinyl-licking hipster and how to survive them.  Your iPod Shuffle and two day old coffee from the pot is safe here friends.  Happy Reading, you Vinyl-Lickers! 

The Things They Sold Us

Before I knew what I believed, I was still on AOL discovering music, burning mix CDs and sometimes cassette tapes, watching movies that made the world feel bigger, and talking late into the night with friends who seemed to know more than me. One of those friends told me about The Boy Who Cried Iraq. I tracked it down, printed it out, and folded it into my backpack like it was something precious. I read that paper over and over. I read it at lunch, between classes, whenever the teacher paused long enough. It felt raw, unfiltered, and maybe even a little dangerous. But it said things I hadn’t heard anywhere else. Around the same time, I found Rock Against Bush and realized that music could challenge power just as sharply. Then came The Fog of War, and suddenly documentaries weren’t just something you watched in school they were something you felt. This collection pulls together the essays, songs, and films that cracked something open in me. Some are angry. Some are careful. Some you can’t even find anymore. But they all helped me realize I didn’t have to accept the version of the world I was being handed. So why am I sharing it now? I don’t know... maybe because it feels relevant again. Maybe because it matters. And this is our space now. So I wanted to share.

nuclear pasta

where the map ends

A collection of haunted thoughts, strange essays, and eerie little things i can’t stop thinking about. Some of it’s beautiful. some of it’s unsettling. all of it feels like home.

A Museum of Internet Art

from the odd to the wholesome, to the disturbing and the comforting, i welcome you all to experience my collection of internet art. art, being very subjective. have fun! try not to trip over the sheer absurdity on your way in. a collection of things i have observed and catalogued during my time here.