/i7hkswf3xj8wrwwlxxu9x14ow7xh)
I apologize for the friends reference, but while I'm at it, I fucking hated Ross. He sucked so much.
Anyway. I love the new year, I love the idea of starting from scratch, jumping into new projects, and feeling open to new possibilities. This year, however, feels like the year for a break, to take some irons out of the fire that just aren't doing well, for my silly little mental health. I've been feeling pretty down and pretty anxious lately. I think because I feel like my to-do list is just too long and convoluted. I decided to cut it down, but I'm still feeling guilty about taking on LESS instead of adding MORE to the new year.
In the style of High Fidelity: Here is my all-time top five things I'm focusing on for 2026-
ONE- SCHOOL- I'm six classes shy of earning my bachelor's degree, and even though I'm close to completing it, the anxiety of online school has been overwhelming. I'm taking a break from school to give myself a chance to reboot my brain and organize my life a little bit. The struggle with guilt over taking a break versus "powering through" is a perplexing dilemma. Why do we feel like if we aren't running around with our hair on fire, we aren't being productive? Rest is still important, even though it doesn't yield any tangible results in the end. Capitalism in the home, I guess. So, school is on the list for this year, after a much-needed breather.
TWO- Final Girls- I have a movie to finish! By February, the movie we have been working on for several months will finally be done and submitted to festivals. Completing the first movie I have ever written myself has turned into a very challenging project. I love creating with my friends, but I think next time I want to scale back on the production size. I think a lot of my anxiety for the last half of the year came from worrying about stepping on toes and what people think about me. I wish it wasn't the case, but it is a hard feeling to ignore. I am proud of what we have created so far and can't wait to share it with the world, but part of me will be so relieved when it is finally done.
THREE- Workin' on my fitness- For most of the last year, I went on a weight loss and fitness journey. I'm really proud of how far I have come (I've lost almost 25 pounds), and how strong and healthy my body is compared to last January. I have goals to become even stronger and more confident in myself this year, including being able to do at least one pull-up! My self-care has evolved into spending time at the gym with my partner and exploring new ways to nourish our bodies without feeling like we have to punish ourselves for having a cookie every now and then.
FOUR- Community- I want to spend more time with friends, host intentional dinners, and book club meet-ups. Something to nourish the side of me that craves community. My partner is my best friend. We talk about everything, and he is my favorite person to spend time with. I do miss having close friends. Girl dinners, grabbing coffee, and going shopping, double dates, or just catching up, while all the collective kids run around the house. There is something about having that kind of platonic relationship with someone that I'm deeply missing. I want to focus on things that bring me joy this year, and community is one of those at the top of my list.
FIVE- Being Imperfect- I'm not sure where to even start with this one; it probably doesn't make sense as a goal for anyone. I want to be okay with things not turning out exactly as I hope them to be. I want to be okay with only two of the things on any of my lists getting done. I want to be okay with the house being a little messy, for not being the perfect mother, partner, or friend. To give myself the forgiveness and grace I give to others. For holding myself accountable when I'm being an absolute shit. For having to apologize, or to ask for an apology when I feel like I need one too. I want permission to just exist, and for that to be messy. I don't want to reach the end of my life and think back at how anxious I was about things that don't matter in the end. I want it to be okay to not be okay for a little while. That is kind of beautiful, also.
This list seems a little crazy, but that's what the new year is for: to think of the craziest things you might be capable of achieving and writing them down, and then hoping it works out. So, here's hoping.
Anyway. I love the new year, I love the idea of starting from scratch, jumping into new projects, and feeling open to new possibilities. This year, however, feels like the year for a break, to take some irons out of the fire that just aren't doing well, for my silly little mental health. I've been feeling pretty down and pretty anxious lately. I think because I feel like my to-do list is just too long and convoluted. I decided to cut it down, but I'm still feeling guilty about taking on LESS instead of adding MORE to the new year.
In the style of High Fidelity: Here is my all-time top five things I'm focusing on for 2026-
ONE- SCHOOL- I'm six classes shy of earning my bachelor's degree, and even though I'm close to completing it, the anxiety of online school has been overwhelming. I'm taking a break from school to give myself a chance to reboot my brain and organize my life a little bit. The struggle with guilt over taking a break versus "powering through" is a perplexing dilemma. Why do we feel like if we aren't running around with our hair on fire, we aren't being productive? Rest is still important, even though it doesn't yield any tangible results in the end. Capitalism in the home, I guess. So, school is on the list for this year, after a much-needed breather.
TWO- Final Girls- I have a movie to finish! By February, the movie we have been working on for several months will finally be done and submitted to festivals. Completing the first movie I have ever written myself has turned into a very challenging project. I love creating with my friends, but I think next time I want to scale back on the production size. I think a lot of my anxiety for the last half of the year came from worrying about stepping on toes and what people think about me. I wish it wasn't the case, but it is a hard feeling to ignore. I am proud of what we have created so far and can't wait to share it with the world, but part of me will be so relieved when it is finally done.
THREE- Workin' on my fitness- For most of the last year, I went on a weight loss and fitness journey. I'm really proud of how far I have come (I've lost almost 25 pounds), and how strong and healthy my body is compared to last January. I have goals to become even stronger and more confident in myself this year, including being able to do at least one pull-up! My self-care has evolved into spending time at the gym with my partner and exploring new ways to nourish our bodies without feeling like we have to punish ourselves for having a cookie every now and then.
FOUR- Community- I want to spend more time with friends, host intentional dinners, and book club meet-ups. Something to nourish the side of me that craves community. My partner is my best friend. We talk about everything, and he is my favorite person to spend time with. I do miss having close friends. Girl dinners, grabbing coffee, and going shopping, double dates, or just catching up, while all the collective kids run around the house. There is something about having that kind of platonic relationship with someone that I'm deeply missing. I want to focus on things that bring me joy this year, and community is one of those at the top of my list.
FIVE- Being Imperfect- I'm not sure where to even start with this one; it probably doesn't make sense as a goal for anyone. I want to be okay with things not turning out exactly as I hope them to be. I want to be okay with only two of the things on any of my lists getting done. I want to be okay with the house being a little messy, for not being the perfect mother, partner, or friend. To give myself the forgiveness and grace I give to others. For holding myself accountable when I'm being an absolute shit. For having to apologize, or to ask for an apology when I feel like I need one too. I want permission to just exist, and for that to be messy. I don't want to reach the end of my life and think back at how anxious I was about things that don't matter in the end. I want it to be okay to not be okay for a little while. That is kind of beautiful, also.
This list seems a little crazy, but that's what the new year is for: to think of the craziest things you might be capable of achieving and writing them down, and then hoping it works out. So, here's hoping.
/i7hkswf3xj8wrwwlxxu9x14ow7xh)
/j4mylynobqor32cxjw5gekk740tv)
Jeff Richardson
14 days ago